15 Days, Day 8

This is part of a writing exercise dictated by this list. It may benefit you to read it if you seek to know me (or merely someone) better; it may benefit me in the selfsame way. And if knowledge of others is your goal, seek out Anna, whose list prompted mine, and Kimi, whom Anna credits for said list.

Day 8
Ways to win your heart?

Truth is, no one’s ever won my heart, though a few girls have stolen it. In fact, if anyone’s been competing in that particular arena they’ve been doing so without my noticing; which, frankly, sucks, kind of like that singing competition a few years back where one of the groups started performing before the judges showed up and had to give an encore performance.

In reality, I can’t answer this question because I don’t know. I’d imagine the biggest qualifier is to be Someone I Am Attracted To (or, using this challenge’s wording, Someone Who Attracts Me). I’m not sure if that’s shallow, because it isn’t meant to be. My criteria (as listed earlier) are sort of innate things, not likely to change very much even if they fluctuate. I said Christian, not Pentecostal or Baptist or Presbyterian. I said story-lover, not gamer or film buff or bookworm.

And, see, “winning” my heart suggests effort, things a girl might do to earn the prize of my affection, which is inherently wrong because in my experience I fall for girls for reasons they couldn’t have intentionally produced even if they were trying (or, more accurately, for reasons they couldn’t have prevented even if they were trying). Sure, there are some nice gestures — going to “my church” or giving games a whirl if you haven’t — but those are really secondary components.

There’s no real room for a how-to here. If I like you it won’t matter whether you’ve got short hair or long hair or purple hair, wear glasses or don’t, wear makeup or don’t, dress preppy or goth, rock prairie skirts or hotpants, love the Beatles or hate them. It’s all window-dressing, and window-dressing doesn’t work. The best display in the world won’t pull me into a shoe store if I don’t want shoes.

Ultimately, I can’t tell you how to win my heart because all my life I’ve only experienced girls trying to keep theirs away from me. Mine’s just sitting there on a pedestal, and last I checked that pedestal wasn’t a weighted trap. Bring along the sandbag just in case, I suppose. But just know: if you’re the sort of girl who stands a chance of having my heart, your problem will be keeping it in my chest and off my sleeve. The way you keep it?

Give me yours.


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